tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-71175942011-09-05T11:01:40.963+01:00e*noreply@blogger.comBlogger2541100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-90050080282865939992009-01-11T19:21:00.003Z2009-01-11T19:31:49.696Z

Okay, I've managed to archive all my posts (published and otherwise) from blogspot + pitas, and am moving out from here to my new domain at http://eitoile.com/. The site is going to be empty for a while, while I slowly play around with HTML, CSS and other random bits. My blog will be at http://eitoile.com/blog - I've installed wordpress, so the blog bit is more or less good to go, if one

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-47360897217972856272009-01-11T01:39:00.007Z2009-01-11T10:08:40.812Z

The Boy is away this weekend, and so I seized the opportunity to be productive - or so I thought!>> I did manage to meet up with cousin J and bring her to Gazette to try their juicy and rich hot foie gras, finally! - The Boy and I had brought her there to try it on New Year's Eve but they had a special NYE's set menu which excluded the foie gras. And this time, when we got there, it wasn't on

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-89607220197839479072009-01-10T11:48:00.003Z2009-01-10T12:07:47.761Z

Hurray!! Thanks to Mak, I finally managed to find a web host (dreamhost) that I liked and finally registered a domain and signed up for 10 years (bulk discount dude...)!I'm pretty excited to be learning new things. I remember the first time I ever hosted a website at yahoo geocities and host.sk in 2001 (the website is dead and gone, and I've lost everything on those sites), and the first time I

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-87562655960058520452009-01-04T23:58:00.002Z2009-01-05T00:33:45.189Z

Okay... projects large and small for this year with target dates and/or measurable milestones for success/failure audit purposes:Micro projects:- Grow my nails (again!), deadline: Q1 2009- Tidy my room and recycle/donate stuff, deadline: Q2 2009- Start drawing up a list of things I want to do before I die (v.26), deadline: Q2 2009Ongoing projects:- Register a domain name and move to a new website

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-4079941374007924542009-01-01T17:45:00.005Z2009-01-11T01:39:25.615Z

I didn't draw up a list of objectives for 2008 at the beginning of last year, so I can't actually compare my year against a set of benchmarks. In fact, my blogging was sporadic at best, and I didn't even post my usual summary of the year for 2007, although I have the key bullet points saved in draft form, which I may, very belatedly, post up some time this year. Ten Eight high/low lights of the

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-14995080685455021002008-12-18T20:24:00.004Z2008-12-18T20:32:32.938Z

I love how the Boy indulges me.To say I am a messy girl would be a gross understatement of mariana-trench depth. An ex-housemate regularly describes my room as a blackhole, and my room at its best (read: worst) would quite easily fit into BBC's featured chaotic work spaces. The afore-mentioned ex-housemate has always said that the reason I've been single for so many years is because my room is a

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-63782398298373505642008-10-24T02:29:00.003+01:002008-12-18T19:31:28.153Z

A couple of weeks ago I decided that I need an expanded work wardrobe now that I'm more client-facing, and a classier, more sophisticated look to counterbalance my petite build and relatively youthful looks and create a more senior, and sobre impression.A combination of wanting a elegant, a deepening antipathy towards ironing, my sudden realisation that my arms aren't *that* fat after all, and

e*noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-80278529848279861652008-10-20T00:42:00.003+01:002008-10-20T01:08:42.912+01:00

This weekend, one of the Boy's friends from uni visited from the States, so on Saturday, the Boy and I met him and one of the Boy's good friend from the next team for drinks. When the two friends and I were alone, they told me that they're surprised at how different/nice the Boy is with me.And the US friend said that yes, he was actually very very impressed.I was like: huh, how so?They said that

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-85385714643388176042008-10-19T23:41:00.002+01:002008-12-18T22:18:07.409Z

When I was in my impressionable early teens, I came across Rudyard Kipling's poem "If" and thought it made a lot of sense, and it would be a good set of principles by which to live my life.More than ten years later, I re-read the poem this week, and think that, by and large, I haven't done too badly, despite having forgotten about the poem and its principles in the intervening years. I put this

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-2698743139461914582008-10-17T23:57:00.002+01:002008-10-18T00:01:43.229+01:00

Yesterday, one of my clients (a senior adviser to the CEO no less) said that on a conference call.It scares the hell out of me and completely demotivates me that I have clients who say that. Why am I wasting my life with these guys? That's what bankers are for, to look after our clients interests and maximise their value. That's why we were hired. If he doesn't want us to do our jobs, we can all

e*noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-42908898303707983682008-09-16T01:08:00.004+01:002008-12-18T22:18:42.247Z

This is proving to be an annus horribilis for financial markets. After spates of bank writedowns and losses, monolines crises, Northern Rock, Bear Stearns, Freddie and Fannie, today opened with Lehman filing for bankruptcy and Merrill Lynch being taken over by Bank of America. In the space of one short year, three large, venerable US financial institutions with long histories have collapsed or

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-47063682151498184562008-09-15T00:37:00.002+01:002008-09-15T01:51:38.063+01:00

Met The Boy's best friend in London and her boyfriend for tea, for "approval" (and they apparently highly approve). And so the circle of people who know about the two of us slowly expands and we're establishing ourselves as a couple. Already his best friend and boyfriend were suggesting that the four of us visit Rome to try real Italian food. And The Boy suggested that we should spend a weekend

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-11238903765425806052008-09-06T00:07:00.004+01:002008-12-18T19:36:17.566Z

Tonight is the first night I am alone for more than one and a half months. And it's quite nice, having this little quiet place called solitude to myself.Since AJ and I got together in the last week of July, we've spend every night together either at his or mine, bar one weekend where I went to Stockholm for a friend's wedding, and I shared a room with a colleague. So I haven't really had the

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1714549183678603782008-08-29T03:23:00.003+01:002008-09-06T00:03:29.117+01:00

There's been radio silence for a while, because it's been a season of confusion here at e* land. Had I written, all I would have produced is a jumble of white noise.In the space of three short months, I went from being a girl who never had a boyfriend in the UK (never having gone out with any boy for more than three dates in a row), to a girl who has gone out with three boys: English boy 1 (SJT),

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-80101411279356065622008-05-03T17:56:00.004+01:002008-05-03T18:25:26.737+01:00

yesterday i did the unthinkable, i texted him: "i'm not sure there's any point in us continuing to see each other. what do you think?"and he emailed two hours later: "hey, just read your text. if you feel that way then that's fine. i am in an all day event today"i had wanted to speak to him. i had wanted to ask him if he actually likes me and wants to see me, to tell him i sometimes wondered how

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-74569725621144952742008-04-29T22:59:00.003+01:002008-05-11T01:11:55.895+01:00

People say relationships are about compromise. But i've been single for seven years. Seven years of taking care of myself, not having someone to cuddle, to soothe and calm me, to hold me and say everything is alright, not having a shoulder to cry on. But also seven years of absolute independence, of doing things my way, as and when I want, no compromises, expecting nothing and giving nothing. I'm

e*noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-21652366939117776232008-04-14T06:24:00.003+01:002008-04-14T06:27:26.118+01:00

as of yesterday, i am now officially seeing someone.SJT and i "formalised" our friendship/relationship/dating in leicester square tube station. yeah... very romantic location, i know.

e*noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-12839888585395793232008-04-06T23:10:00.003+01:002008-05-11T01:00:43.447+01:00

I am loving my ensuite bathroom and the privacy it affords me to do all the hundreds of little crucial things that we girls need to do to make ourselves look beautiful. It was a real struggle in the past... hopping/catching/ferrying/dripping between my room and the bathroom, trying not the hog the bathroom, and avoid being caught in a state of undignified deshabille.I had a conversation with my

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-54113868306673085892008-03-08T00:43:00.002Z2008-03-08T00:54:37.314Z

Thursday night, as I was coming home from work in a cab past 1am, the cab driver told me that there's an old saying in the cab business that when the black cab business sneezes, the City of London catches a cold.And he told me, that the black cab drivers knew, from May last year, that 2008 was going to be a bad year for their business and the economy, so they had all started to tighten their

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-45997455675819290812008-02-17T23:16:00.002Z2008-02-18T00:38:07.184Z

Last night I had a reunion night out in a new-ish relaunched club in SoHo with some (ex) colleagues and friends. I ended up spending most of the night chatting to the housemate of one of my colleagues-a tall gentle giant (1.98m tall!) with a lovely Northern accent-standing on a platform so we could speak face to face. We hit it off in one of those rare (for me) alchemic (alcoholic?) mix of

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-45469777915550126932007-12-25T14:32:00.000Z2007-12-25T14:58:05.432Z

I haven't written in a while. Haven't written as much as I would like to. It's been a tough few months work-wise in terms of the number of hours worked, as well as mentally/emotionally. I had a mini meltdown at work, and cried again the week after, which is record-breakingly frequent. I almost yelled at one of my juniors (I avoided it by hanging up on him instead) and told another that I'm

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-78028059514848779522007-11-08T01:31:00.000Z2007-11-08T01:34:07.377Z

My favourite part of going away (at least for work) is coming home. I feel a palpable sense of relief, of my chest expanding and being able to breathe in more deeply when I reach the immigration/arrivals hall at Heathrow.

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-39658522518420203002007-11-05T08:37:00.000Z2007-11-05T08:57:05.176Z

I'm waiting yet again in the same familiar departure lounge for yet another flight. This flight, as many of my flights, has been delayed, and with a surreal sense of being trapped in an eternal repetitive cycle, I'm waiting for my departure gate to be announced, uncertain if I will get to board in half an hour, an hour, or if the flight will be cancelled. Sometimes it seems like I spend my entire

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-70851918816991119922007-10-24T23:52:00.000+01:002007-10-25T00:51:31.488+01:00

I called Perce, my fellow road-tripper, last night to catch up and reminisce about the good old days. I vividly remember the road trip when I think about it: the sights, the places, highs and lows, the food, quarrels, laughter, emotions. I remember being exhausted in Vegas, freezing to death in Yellowstone trying to keep warm under the Red Indian rugs that we bought on the way from Grand Canyon,

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-51387486739484328762007-10-22T23:56:00.000+01:002007-10-25T00:20:35.696+01:00

It's the season of love and marriage. Today, I received news of three engagements: 1) of a girl in M&A (from my class) who got engaged to a senior in the same team (at least 4 years apart in rank), 2) an old friend of mine from A level days, 3) another girl from my team who has been with her boyfriend for 9 years.I'm reaching the age where, one by one, the people around me are getting engaged and

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-50786202802616223392007-10-22T02:18:00.000+01:002007-10-24T23:51:34.660+01:00

It's funny how quickly things change: moods, situations, outlooks... life is constantly in flux. Yet the substance seems to remain broadly the same. Until one day, you wake up, and realise that you have gone through an entire cycle of renewal, without having noticed it. And ten months of another year have passed. Another year has come and almost gone. You have reached that quarter of a century

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-60496092083708404502007-10-07T23:21:00.000+01:002007-10-11T22:22:48.793+01:00

I've not been very productive on the writing front recently, with work taking a surprisingly large proportion of my waking hours, and lots of exhausting work-travel (getting into the country at 3-4am, then waking up for a 9am start), and the rest of my time spent either unwinding, going out, recuperating, and trying (still unsuccessfully) to put my room into a shape that resembles a little less

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-29366714822687820872007-09-15T01:34:00.001+01:002007-09-23T11:29:40.725+01:00

It's funny how generally contented I've been for the past 2 weeks.Work has been very hectic during the week, with first-year-like hours during on weekdays (1.30-3.00am), but with the weekends mostly mercifully off. And this week my vision actually turned blurry one day (!!), but therefore decided to leave early (9pm) and meet friends for dinner instead. So in the past 2 weeks, despite the work,

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-72378462635591035092007-09-02T23:15:00.000+01:002007-09-04T00:54:52.965+01:00

Someone said that what he looks for in a life partner is someone with whom, when the kids have grown up and left the nest, he can go whale-watching with.I smiled. It is a simple, beautiful picture. A boy and a girl (both silver-haired and bent), arms around each other, on the deck of a boat, watching whales off the glacial arctic coast.I smiled too because I could imagine doing it with him, this

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-45583108014610489072007-08-31T22:54:00.000+01:002007-09-02T23:11:53.241+01:00

On a recent global training programme for my firm, I met a Malaysia colleague, who happens to be bumiputera ("son of the earth"), who expressed surprise that I didn't want to go back to Malaysia: "Why?" he asked. I looked at him like he like he had two heads and three eyes. Was he actually seriously asking me that question? And with a straight face! I wasn't sure if I could tell him the truth.

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-31475231583986009812007-08-30T00:28:00.000+01:002007-08-30T00:49:11.500+01:00

My body is driving me nuts. In addition to my usual crush-a-minute, I have been strangely, powerfully, chemically attracted to wildly improbable and inappropriate boys recently. It's as if a kind of genetic, biological switch has been turned on post 25th birthday (tick tock tick tock?) and my body is crazily throwing off pheromones. Suddenly I'm not only attracted to my usual sort of either: i)

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-9154293964747535872007-08-19T01:39:00.000+01:002007-08-19T01:43:44.424+01:00

yes, it's true. I meet a perfectly eligible decent-looking man with whom i've had an hour and a half's worth of great conversation in a lovely bar in Notting Hill, and I panic and hop into the first cab I see, without saying a proper goodbye or giving him a chance to get my number.What is wrong with me? Why do I always do that?! Arggghhhhh!!

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-54331692706751887392007-08-12T23:54:00.000+01:002007-08-13T00:45:21.978+01:00

"Negaraku" - malay for "My country", also the title of my national anthem.This is the you-tube rap video that has made it all over the Malaysian/Malaysian-related online community late last week (yeah, I know, an internet age ago). It's really quite good - musically, as well as the salient points the rap makes. The rap is really satirical and funny, and very true. (I'll translate it some day when

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-32936091436068883642007-08-08T00:21:00.000+01:002007-08-08T00:40:40.334+01:00

So I took the very first preliminary baby-steps today, and went to view 3 properties in the Marylebone area (two 1-bed, one 2-bed) and choked. Ladies and gentleman, look at me carefully - you see before you the face of a life-long tenant!For the amount I was expected to cough up, I certainly wasn't getting much! So I wanted Marylebone because of the location, and the estate agent said that the

e*noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-85086259763608296842007-08-05T23:32:00.000+01:002007-08-06T21:47:42.836+01:00

Today I finally went for my first ever belly-dancing lesson/workshop. After years and years of talking about it and wanting to go for lessons - I remember the first time I was meant to take belly-dancing lessons was either in my late secondary school or early JC days, back in 1998-1999. It was an old school-friend who had suggested it, the same girl who had suggested going for French classes at

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-73693785015824368442007-08-05T01:16:00.000+01:002007-08-05T10:23:06.243+01:00

It's official, I'm back to my awkward, ditzy, day-dreamy adolescent days..I'm completely infatuated with my french summer course class mate! he's this tall, tanned, fit, slightly rough-around-the-edges yet intellectual-looking bespectacled English guy with adorably messy golden brown hair, and some fuzz on his forearms. I had initially dismissed him as a good-looking (oh yes, that much was

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-53521498092664463882007-08-02T23:57:00.000+01:002007-08-04T14:20:56.484+01:00

I have not posted for a full calendar month - the month of July! Unprecedented, unbelievable, unforgivable! My birthday month, no less. But I was away on my whirlwind holiday with neither time nor wish to think. I wanted a proper break from the regular world, responsibilities, patterns, behaviour...It was a good break. I came back to work very jetlagged, yet with more enthusiasm and energy than I

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-83219373247451732672007-06-26T01:14:00.001+01:002007-06-26T02:37:18.166+01:00

We got the chat last Friday (the rating, the feedback, strengths, weaknesses, impression of the team, how you're feeling etc.), and today we got the number. A spreadsheet benchmarking the numbers had already been circulated, and this was bang in with the expectations, so I wasn't particularly happy nor sad. But this wasn't the number I knew some people would get, and that I wanted, which was the

e*noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-73531019687822315682007-06-24T23:02:00.001+01:002007-06-24T23:26:44.107+01:00

Hier, dans mon classe français, nous avons joué un petit jeu qui s'appelle "portrait chinois". Mon portrait chinois a m'intriguée parce que je pense il a été très indicatif de mon esprit pendant cette period.Mon portrait chinois est dessous:Si j'étais un couleur, je serais bleuSi j'étais une émotion, je serais confusionSi j'étais une saison, je serais l'automneSi j'étais un animal, je serais un

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-46761089823831495632007-06-13T23:06:00.000+01:002007-06-14T00:19:03.909+01:00

It seems like I haven't written in ages. And when I look through my posts, I find that it is true that I have been absent at best. But if I go through the unpublished posts, then I see some posts, or notes-to-self for key events and thoughts that I want to remember when I'm older.I'm trying to get used to writing again. Simply because it is too easy to slip back into silence. If I keep the

e*noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-3033340745369446742007-05-10T23:01:00.000+01:002007-06-06T23:59:21.709+01:00

why? what does that mean anyway??

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-44818835290957656352007-05-02T01:21:00.001+01:002008-05-11T00:35:16.835+01:00

I spent an extended weekend (Saturday to Monday) in Amsterdam/the Netherlands, for my long overdue trip to Amsterdam to check out the legendary red light district, smoke up, and celebrate Queen's Day with the Dutchies.I come away bemused. I find the the Netherlands a curious, charming country. Curious because there are aspects of their culture which seem truly unique, and also because of the

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-43261958023265698252007-04-15T23:20:00.000+01:002007-04-26T01:02:34.912+01:00

Today, on yet another beautiful, sunny, warm, clear April day, we had our first barbeque of the season, and the first barbeque in two years.Oh, and what joy it brought me! (I know... I've been positively brimming with bliss recently, but truly, happiness is an extremely under-rated emotion!)A couple of my housemates and I spent the greater part of yesterday hacking away at the jungle that was our

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-27371442113189317382007-04-12T23:47:00.000+01:002007-04-13T00:46:54.254+01:00

In one episode of Sex and The City, Samantha compares men to taxis (cabs) - whether they decide to marry a girl has nothing to do with the girl, and more to do with timing - whether they are ready or not. When men are ready, they turn their taxi light on, and BOOM, they marry the next girl they meet. It's all down to dumb luck.I'm thinking the scriptwriters might have a point.Right now, I semi

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-83609143743742476072007-04-02T01:35:00.000+01:002007-04-02T01:39:41.911+01:00

Just came back from a 9-day ski holiday on Saturday, 31 March. Had a smashing time, mostly not skiing-related - more the company, the relaxing (learning to relax and take things easy), the time and space to think... Pictures to come once I find my cable...Gorgeous weather in London today as well, and a lovely day out with 2 lovely girls from work. Discovering Spitalfields...and now to bed, for

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-16070093306092446682007-03-20T00:02:00.000Z2007-03-20T00:53:58.704Z

A couple of weeks of glorious blue skies, bright sun, and balmy weather (bar today) seem to herald spring in this grey and damp little island. As the temperature gets warmer, the days longer, my working hours shorter, and my weekends freer, I find that I'm falling in love with my city again.A stroll in the park, a comedy night and clubbing in Balham, a walk along the river, a browse around the

e*noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-13892967384693613682007-03-05T00:38:00.000Z2007-03-15T23:52:35.896Z

A few weeks ago, I suddenly felt like calling my mom - it'd been a while - so I did. I had caught her crying and asked what was wrong.Apparently she had just gotten news that one of her old friends had passed away of cancer. She had been fairly close to this girl back in her nursing school days. But somehow they had lost touch after nursing school, and she happened to get back in contact with the

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-71180399678099269302007-03-04T11:18:00.000Z2007-03-05T00:38:37.241Z

I have had a nightmare couple of weeks at work with non-stop work (including on weekends) and long lists of to-dos over about 7-8 projects/tasks to juggle with - one day I actually asked someone: what day is it today? Is it Wednesday? - The days had all blended into one another. By the end of the week, I was very highly strung - jittery and practically twitching with nervousness. Someone at work

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-64351038527287106192007-02-20T01:35:00.000Z2007-02-20T02:19:57.202Z

I've just discovered the song "I need to be in love" by the Carpenters (co-written by Richard Carpenter, John Bettis and Albert Hammond) in my ipod today. And the lyrics seem to describe me perfectly (see lyrics below), particularly because over CNY, my cousin JS said that my problem was that I was too demanding. I have too many criteria, expect too much from a boy, and will therefore never find

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-66176887127045128752007-02-19T00:29:00.000Z2007-03-04T11:18:08.055Z

I don't understand this whole one night stand thing that these Europeans have got going on. Well, particularly European guys, although it takes two to clap.So, on Friday, on a spontaneous whim, I decided to synthetically replicate the experience of a one night stand without the actual commitment of getting to know each other in the biblical sense.The boy's opening line was: Do you speak English?

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-34801063190537061362007-02-19T00:12:00.000Z2007-02-19T00:27:43.084Z

Happy Chinese New Year all! According to my friend, this is the year of the Golden Pig, which comes once every 60 years, and is supposed to be particularly prosperous (it is "gold" after all, in the typically pragmatic and materialistic chinese way).I read the Chinese horoscope, and this is supposed to be an infinitely better year for me than last year, the year of the Dog.Had a cosy reunion

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-19577410941117921822007-02-14T01:07:00.000Z2007-02-14T01:07:50.443Z

***On another note:Happy Val's Day all!I hate the over-commercialisation of VD (Venereal Disease, anyone?), the relentless marketing and promotions, and the ubiquitous red hearts. But to me it's something special as well - because, for me, this is the one day that I especially think of friends. I had resolved long ago, during the days when I was the only attached one, and all my friends were

e*noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-14770855749518863022007-02-14T00:57:00.000Z2007-02-14T00:57:34.741Z

I was the customs check-in earlier today (yesterday) after a 2-day business trip, and the immigration officer asked me: "What's the purpose of your visit here?"Maybe it was partly because of my lack of sleep, but I was completely disoriented and confused. What was she talking about? I was coming home, and very much relieved to be back too.Then it hit me: she thought I was visiting the UK. (yeah,

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-61557539703191367942007-02-09T01:51:00.000Z2007-02-09T03:03:16.615Z

It comes and goes, this whole depressive thing that I've got going on.There are days, weeks when I'm all buoyant and upbeat. But I tread carefully, always thankful for another good day, and ever alert to the threat of drowning which dogs my every step, barely flickering at the edge of my vision. Then suddenly, the shadow-like dark wave surges and threatens to engulf me. And I tread water

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1170725092191217382007-02-06T01:11:00.000Z2007-03-15T23:55:02.401Z

Love, marriage, and kids.My outlook and attitude towards all have varied considerably through the course of my life. Swinging from one end of the spectrum to the other and back. Always heavily charged with deep, complicated emotions.For some reason, at some point when I was in Hong Kong, I had come to the discovery/decision that yes, eventually I DO want to have kids.One might laugh at me: Of

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1170200359443055972007-01-30T22:46:00.000Z2007-02-02T02:13:54.530Z

i know i'm more prone than most people are to look back. one could almost say i have an unhealthy obsession with the past. we have already obviously established that i'm an obsessive person.i've probably said this before somewhere, sometime just recently.. that for a long time, i felt like i was still 18... up until... i don't know... maybe some time late last year, when all of a sudden, i felt

e*noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1170122823359266772007-01-30T01:28:00.000Z2007-01-30T22:45:32.593Z

it's strange really... the truth is, i have nothing much to complain about. my life is going just as swimmingly well as it possibly can - my work is boring but well well-renumerating, my work/life balance has actually improved over the last couple of months, i'm fairly healthy, and debt-free, i have things to do, some family and friends that i care for here.i am one of the lucky ones. just about

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1170028852946971492007-01-28T23:27:00.000Z2007-01-29T00:00:53.156Z

Because I now have only one over-riding (immediate) aim in life: to forget Cavé, my life has become simple, almost fun and exciting, in a comic way.I am always trying to find things to do, to find things to be excited about, put inordinate amount of thought and effort into things I would not have cared about before.For example, I have a Moulin-Rouge themed house party coming up, and I have

e*noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1169424671297465362007-01-21T23:43:00.000Z2007-01-30T23:56:52.686Z

This weekend, or yesterday in particular, has been one of the most productive in recent times.I went into the office four times in total during the course of the day, the first time starting at 7am, in order to process a markup, and the last ending at 1am. But in between and after, I managed to go to French class, go for a drink with a blind date, watch a movie with a friend, and go out clubbing

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1168908208400950672007-01-16T00:01:00.000Z2007-01-16T00:43:28.556Z

I got the unofficial word today, that the NYC thing, it's not happening.I am semi numb. Unsure of how/what to feel.Relieved. Disappointed. Panicked. Desperate. Petrified. Frustrated. Despairing. Reckless.My emotions flash up, are swallowed up. Resurface, disappear.I need to clear my head of these cloudy emotions and make sure I don't end up making a decision that I will regret. I am afraid I will

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1168566055295282632007-01-12T00:49:00.000Z2007-01-15T01:39:16.526Z

This year, all eleven days of it, has been weird so far. Surreal (I'm using that word a lot lately, which demonstrates my point precisely). On one hand, it doesn't seem like it can already be 2007. I have barely gotten used to 2006 yet. And it's already 2007. I am still writing "2006" in all my dates. And it is only with my banker glasses that I'm finally beginning to slightly have, that I manage

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1167757949684194842007-01-02T16:46:00.001Z2007-01-12T00:48:52.606Z

Am in HKIA (Hong Kong International Airport) now, waiting to board my international budget flight back to London.It's been a whirlwind five days in Hong Kong. It seems like everyone knows everyone in this place. 6.9 million people in the Hong Kong SAR, and yet there are like 5 bars/clubs which everyone goes to. The expat community seems to be really tight. And the Hong Kong chinese (hell... the

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1166727292780288592006-12-21T18:26:00.000Z2006-12-22T01:10:42.216Z

I know, I know, it's getting boring, this whole Cavé situation.But I promise, it will stop one day. If all goes well, his name will no longer appear on this site in no more than three months' time.I am making Herculean effort to get my rotation to NY. And in general, I'm optimistic. I have a good feeling about it. Fingers crossed.I have been mentally preparing myself to leave London. Particularly

e*noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1166725009711373102006-12-21T17:57:00.000Z2006-12-21T18:16:49.733Z

Been reading this amazing book that my Dad sent me. The truth is, I've always been a bit (okay.. a lot) of a lazy girl. As a child, my Dad used to always urge me to watch documentaries with him, or financial news programmes, or ask me to sit with him while he fixed up the computer so he could teach me.But I'd always been: yeah yeah, whatever. No, later. It's boring etc.Years later, I'm kicking

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1165971844393060542006-12-13T01:03:00.000Z2006-12-16T02:54:42.563Z

Breathe.One day I will forget the pain and confusion. The pain that made me agree to go to a spa (spa??) over christmas, and book a flight to Hong Kong on a whim to spend a long New Year's weekend, just because I am afraid of being alone. Alone and depressed with my pain and confusion. I want to be in a crowd which will drown out the noise within.What will be, will be. I must remember that. Hold

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1164763297450305052006-11-29T01:10:00.000Z2006-11-29T01:21:37.476Z

My darling baby macbook had arrived the day I was due to fly off for a dose of winter sun, so I only managed to play with it today. I had itched so badly to open it, and finally did so at work, oh so briefly, just to get it set up.I only managed to explore a couple of the functins once I got home.And in my day 0 of using apple mac, I've fallen in love.I love that I managed to connect to the net

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1164762614298376792006-11-29T00:57:00.000Z2006-11-29T01:10:14.340Z

I'm back from my extended weekend in Singapore. Stepped off my 16-hour flight at 7.20am with my backpack no checked-in luggage) and went straight to the office after a quick shower stop at the gym. I was in the office by 10.15am.I am superlatively happy that I had this lovely, if somewhat travel-intensive weekend. It was just what I needed.A break from London.Time away to think things through, to

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1163726330962053592006-11-17T01:10:00.000Z2006-11-17T01:18:50.983Z

It's been a while since I last wrote, not because I've been heartbroken over having been LJBF-ed ("Let's Just Be Friends"-ed), although it has been a tough time for me, but because my PC has very ungraciously and inconsiderately upped and died on me. For about two weeks, I have lived sans internet access, which has been unbearable.I'm writing because I finally have internet access and the time

e*noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1161925856464527792006-10-27T05:53:00.000+01:002007-04-18T00:29:21.655+01:00

he says i'm a beautiful woman. i'm a beautiful person. he holds me, puts his hand on my head, puts his arms around me neck and sayshe loves me, but he's not in love with mehe says though, that very honestly, when i was wearing that ridiculous red curly haired wig and dancing, he was in love with me. for just that moment.he asks me what i want.i don't want anything i reply. i sit in a corner of

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1161660764070558592006-10-24T04:26:00.000+01:002006-10-24T11:48:10.653+01:00

I survived my first day.I told Cavé that I liked him on Sunday. No, I actually told him that he was the first person who I thought might be The One. And he effectively said no. And today it's all business as usual back in the office.It was over drinks on Friday that I ended up crying a little in a small underground bar in Covent Garden. I'd been sad about work. In the end, because I was feeling

e*noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1160354558181545202006-10-09T00:01:00.000+01:002006-10-09T01:42:38.350+01:00

Today (Sunday, 8th October), I flew.I finally took a flying leap of faith out of a plane (safely strapped to an instructor) for my first ever skydive.It's been one of the items on my "List of things to do before I die" which I had began compiling when I was in my early teens. It was one of the scary but exhilarating things I thought I'd never have the guts to do but would definitely want to

e*noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1159312364200686282006-09-27T00:04:00.000+01:002006-09-27T00:12:44.226+01:00

I went to get new spectacles made today. When Gemma, one of the shop assistants, measured the distance between my eyes, she looked at the reading on the machine and commented: "Wow, your eyes are the same distance apart from your nose. That's really rare. You must have a very symmetrical face."

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1159143804203852292006-09-25T00:45:00.000+01:002006-09-25T01:23:24.240+01:00

I generally hate winter. The short days and long hours of darkness depress me. The cold makes me miserable to the core. Waking up becomes more of a chore than usual, taking showers is a torture. My face is wind-whipped, my fingers nipped by the cold, my skin turns painfully parched, and I shiver in the mornings under my duvet, or on the way to work.This winter I shall be happier. For the first

e*noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1158537149154535682006-09-18T00:03:00.000+01:002006-09-18T00:52:29.320+01:00

On Saturday, I went to watch a play, a classic British farce "See how they run" at the Duchess Theatre. On one hand, it was far too slapstick for my usual taste; on the other hand, as unintellectually engaging as it was, it kept me in stitches for a good one-and-a-half to two hours. I can't remember the last time I had laughed so hard or so long (so continuously).And through my laughter I could

e*noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1156955099098292672006-08-30T17:19:00.000+01:002006-08-30T17:24:59.140+01:00

Mostar, Bosnia HercegovinaIn a small underground internet cafe on next to Mostar's Old Bridge trying to sort out my Banja Luka accommodation and stay awake.Only about 4,5 hours' sleep two nights ago after a long night out partying in Dubrovnik's Latino Club Fuego, one of the "one-and-a-half" night clubs in Dubrovnik according to our lovely Dubrovnik boy whom we had met on the Lumbarda beach in

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1156848956201422032006-08-29T11:53:00.000+01:002006-08-29T11:55:56.713+01:00

My last day in Dubrovnik. On the second week of my 2-week vacation around Croatia and Bosnia, and the first time I'm getting internet access, mainly to research the logistics of the last leg of my trip sans cousin J. Been an Amazing time so far.

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1154053489356304972006-07-28T02:36:00.000+01:002006-07-28T03:24:51.820+01:00

The Espagnol from my team (my Espagnol) resigned today. I was in shock. In my head, I was running round and round like a headless chicken repeating: he's leaving he's leaving he's leaving he's leaving he's leaving. I couldn't deal. Repeating in my head like a broken recorder was the only way I could come to terms with it, the only way my mind could grasp it.How could he?I had expected to be the

e*noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1153868857753900072006-07-25T23:17:00.000+01:002006-07-26T00:11:01.430+01:00

It surprises me and warms my heart to find that idealism is alive and well. In the routine hustle and bustle of life, it seems like everyone is self-absorbed, marching to the same capitalist tune, and no one cares. But recently I've found idealism serendipitously, in the unlikeliest of shapes and forms.Dutch boy, who is pained by the state the world is in, and deeply wants to make a difference in

e*noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1153787376226980602006-07-25T00:26:00.000+01:002006-07-25T01:29:36.416+01:00

July has been an eventful month so far. A quick recap:- Italy won the World Cup on 9th of July in penalties against France. Hooray!! My (second) team!! It Had to win.. the last time it won the World Cup was in 1982, the year I was born, it was destined to win again this year. I knew there was a reason for me to support it!- My housemate left the house and the country for good, the end of an era-

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1153357918262404432006-07-20T02:07:00.000+01:002006-07-20T02:11:58.283+01:00

I never used to understand why some people I've spoken to said they would like to have a separate bathroom from their spouse. I had never been possesive about that particular space and never saw the point of being so.Now, I've learnt to be jealous.I want my bathroom to be like a lover—to be ready and waiting invitingly for only me when I get home (late) at night, and when I wake up in the

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1153093882989146882006-07-17T00:50:00.000+01:002006-07-17T00:51:23.013+01:00

usually get v. depressed on birthdays, but this one was okay..

e*noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1150672978302432272006-06-19T00:03:00.000+01:002006-06-19T00:26:46.686+01:00

Was introduced to trance music this weekend. I had never liked trance, house, electronica and such music. Was always more of a cheesy music fan (anything with words really). Okay with R&B, although that gets boring after a while. My introduction to D&B at The Mass, Brixton, went okay. It took a few songs, but I eventually warmed up it.It was the same with trance. DJ Tiesto, apparently the Number

e*noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1150068540462187152006-06-12T00:18:00.000+01:002006-06-12T00:29:00.463+01:00

2 nights of dancing all night and going to bed past 6am in the morning with colleagues from all over the world—Asia, US, Australia. was incredible fun.

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1149638922597366982006-06-07T00:19:00.000+01:002006-06-07T01:08:43.676+01:00

The World Cup is fast approaching and football fever has gripped my team. The Francais organised a football match at an artificial pitch near work a couple of weeks ago, with all the junior guys in my team and a few guys from other teams playing. Myself and two other girls went along to watch and be 'cheerleaders'.The same boy is now organising a global football match at our global team offsite

e*noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1149460944508096382006-06-04T23:39:00.000+01:002006-07-15T08:14:35.553+01:00

Renoir Cinema at Brunswick SquareFor my own reference, all the French films I have watched so far:RomanceSur mes levres (Read my lips)Le Placard (The closet)Le temps qui reste (Time to leave)Sex is ComedyLe gout les autres (The taste of others)Jeux d'enfants (Love me if you dare)Les visiteurs (The visitors)Ma femme est une actrice (My wife is an actress)NikitaJeanne d'ArcLe pere noel est une

e*noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1149117452932582732006-06-01T00:13:00.000+01:002006-06-01T00:17:32.933+01:00

Sometimes I scribble down thoughts or ideas as they occur to me, but either or don't think they are relevant, or don't have the time to develop them, so I write as much as I can in a rough form then Save As Draft, to finish up later, or to keep forever in its rough unpolished form for my own record.Then when I have the time or inclination, I go back, edit for grammar or refine the thesis then hit

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1147650207381394902006-05-14T22:48:00.000+01:002006-05-17T00:56:39.753+01:00

I've just watched this weird and wonderful French film "Jeux d'enfants" (literally "Children's games"), also known as "Love me if you dare". See the official film website http://www.paramountclassics.com/loveme/index2.html, which describes it as "part ultra-modern cartoon fairy-tale, part bold psychological probe into the games we play in life and love"It's a crazy, almost Absurdist film, with

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1146610628941706832006-05-02T22:55:00.001+01:002008-05-10T23:16:48.744+01:00

Today, over dinner, I had one of the funniest conversations I've had in a while.Dinner at work was myself with 4 other guys: a Spanish, a French, a German, and an Eastern European.So I asked them for Their secret strategies or tips in the dating game. I just realised my comparative advantage : here I was, surrounded by guys at work—I had a wealth of information and resources for my tapping.My

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1146434817013058882006-04-30T22:55:00.000+01:002006-06-01T00:12:18.556+01:00

In my early teens, I realised that I tended to think of God as male. And, wanting to counter what I saw as yet another symptom of stealth male domination and the patriarchal nature of society in order to subvert the feminine position in society (yes, I saw life being played out as a constant struggle for dominance between the sexes), I consciously tried to imagine God as female. "She", I

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1146386641522934902006-04-30T09:40:00.000+01:002006-06-01T00:04:59.036+01:00

So, in the bright daylight of the morning, I have decided to stay on for one more night. Partly because the flight prices have inched up even further, and it is beyond what I feel I can justify for the cost of being capricious. Plus, I have persuaded myself that the amount that I have saved by not taking an earlier flight is "found money" and therefore I can go shopping! :D

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1146353340522034082006-04-29T23:49:00.000+01:002006-06-01T00:00:03.983+01:00

This is my second or third last night in Italy. It has been 9 days since I've set off from London on this solo Italian trip. Initially I had been very gung-ho, booking the first flight back in on Tuesday morning, with the intention of going straight in to work (late) from the airport.But as the days pass, I find myself being more tired than expected, and more travel-weary than I would have

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1145560221187166152006-04-20T19:16:00.000+01:002006-04-23T20:13:54.320+01:00

I rarely watch TV. But I love American sitcoms like My So-Called Life, Friends, Ally McBeal, Sex and the City, Desperate Housewives. Really mainstream prime time pre-packaged, glossy, bite-sized caricatures of the American Life, which probably has nothing to do with reality of course.And even then, I have never watched all the episodes of any of the shows, much less in chronological order. I

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1145403103075724382006-04-18T23:47:00.000+01:002006-04-19T00:31:45.016+01:00

Today, the Dutch boy who was with me at Pangaea on Thursday night, asked me: "So, did he call?"I told him that he texted and I called (at cousin J's behest) to arrange the meet up because it was more convenient than to-ing and fro-ing with the texting. No no no no no, he tut-tutted. You look desperate if you call. You should never call, always always text, and you should wait and chill before

e*noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1145315239234317492006-04-17T23:55:00.000+01:002006-04-18T00:09:33.210+01:00

Went to Cornwall with a girl from uni this Easter weekend. Penzance, Newlyn, Mousehole (yes, there's a village called Mousehole!), Land's End, St Ives, St Michael's Mount. 3 days of fresh air, sea breeze, rolling hills, craggy cliffs, glittering waters and so much walking. Taking random paths that happen to strike our imaginations, tunneling through undergrowth, muddy paths. Sitting on

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1145314361205130792006-04-17T23:24:00.000+01:002006-04-17T23:52:41.286+01:00

Thursday night out on the town before the long Easter weekend. For the first time in my life, I gave my number out to a stranger, a guy I'd met and danced with at the club. Today, we had a three-hour coffee (orange juice for me), and for the first time in my life, I managed to avoid disaster—in other words, I managed to avoid: 1) bringing up/even mentioning The Ex, 2) talking about other guys 3)

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1144621391972459412006-04-09T22:58:00.000+01:002006-04-09T23:24:26.316+01:00

Some time ago, my cousin J, probably thinking I lacked spiritual guidance, passed me Deepak Chopra's "Seven spiritual laws of success" that she had borrowed for me from the library. When I saw the title I did a double-take: You must be joking. But I decided to give it a go. It was a very slim book. I thought: who knows, maybe my salvation, if I needed deliverance, could very well come from its

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1144618740498248132006-04-09T22:27:00.000+01:002006-04-09T22:50:38.186+01:00

I've come to the conclusion that how I feel about life and myself probably owes more to hormones than the objective reality of actual events/situations.Just a couple of weeks ago, I was feeling all happy and bright and cheery. Thinking: I'm the luckiest girl in the world. Things are going so well for me, can life get any better. And that was when I came to this realisation that my hopefulness and

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1144022469188960182006-04-03T00:10:00.001+01:002008-05-10T23:05:17.613+01:00

31st March, last Friday of the month. Braving a cold, I went to a breakdancing event called Throwdown Live at the Mass in Brixton. I thought it would be pretty rough or dangerous. But, surprisingly, as was the case in Stringfellows, it felt really safe. The boys were almost comically polite and respectful. Even tall, burly guys in singlets would step aside and very ceremoniously let my petite

e*noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1143829621353435892006-03-31T19:18:00.000+01:002006-04-09T22:09:59.376+01:00

Went for a charity ski trip to Verbier in aid of Calvert Trust (www.calvert-trust.org.uk), which specialises in outdoor activities for disabled people, on 23rd-26th of March.It was fantabulous! The second time I'd ever skiied in my life, and this was miles better than the first.I and two other friends who are complete beginners got a private instructor (from La Fantastique. I spent the first day

e*noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7117594.post-1142794231223964972006-03-19T17:57:00.000Z2006-03-19T22:03:08.306Z

Time: 18:20Since the idea of mango with fish first occured to me, it has quietly but insistently made itself heard. Slowly, the idea began to take root, expand.. what, how, do I dare... I decided on cod in the first instance (though I find salmon and mango interesting too), baked in tin foil. Yet my fear kept me back—my house oven isn't exactly working. And the idea persisted and became louder.

e*noreply@blogger.com4